Eating Disorders

If you and others have observed behaviors in your friend or roommate that are suggestive of an eating disorder, you are in a position to help.

• Make a plan to approach the person in a private place when there is no immediate stress and time to talk.
• Present what you have observed and what your concerns are in a caring but straightforward way. Tell him or her you are worried and want to help. Friends who are too angry with the person to talk supportively should not be a part of this discussion.
• Give the person time to talk and encourage them to express their feelings. Ask clarifying questions, listen carefully and accept what is said in a non-judgmental manner.
• Do not argue about whether there is or is not a problem. Power struggles are not helpful. Perhaps you can say, "I hear what you are saying, and I hope you are right that this is not a problem. I am still very worried about what I have seen and heard, and that is not going to go away."
• Provide information about resources for treatment. Offer to go with the person and wait while they have their first appointment with a counselor, doctor or nutritionist. Ask them to consider going for one appointment before they make a decision about ongoing treatment.
• If you are concerned the eating disorder is severe or life-threatening, enlist the help of a doctor, therapist, a counseling center, relative, friend or roommate of the person before you intervene. Present a united and supportive front with others.
• If the person denies the problem, becomes angry or refuses treatment, understand this is often part of the illness. Besides, they have a right to refuse treatment unless their life is in danger. You may feel helpless, angry and frustrated with them. You might say, "I know you can refuse to go for help, but that will not stop me from worrying about you or caring about you. I may bring this up again to you later, and maybe we can talk more about it then." Follow through on that and on any other promises you make.
• Do not be a hero or a rescuer, you will probably be resented. If you do the best you can to help on several occasions and the person does not accept it, stop. Remind yourself you have done all that is reasonable to do.
• Eating disorders are usually not emergency situations. But if the person is suicidal or otherwise in serious danger, seek professional help immediately.

The above material was adapted from material produced by Dr. Herrin, Dr. Fishman, and Eating Disorder and Prevention, Inc.

Be aware, a sufferer does not need to appear underweight or even of average weight to suffer from any of these signs and symptoms. Many men and women with eating disorders do not appear to be underweight.

• Dramatic weight loss in a relatively short period of time
• Wearing big or baggy clothes or dressing in layers to hide body shape and/or weight loss
• Obsession with weight and complaining of weight problems even if they are of average weight or thin
• Obsession with calories and fat content of foods
• Obsession with continuous exercise
• Frequent trips to the bathroom immediately following meals and sometimes accompanied with water running in the bathroom for a long period of time to hide the sound of vomiting
• Visible food restriction and self-starvation
• Visible bingeing and/or purging
• Use or hiding use of diet pills, laxatives, ipecac syrup — which can be lethal — or enemas
• Isolation and fear of eating around and with others
• Unusual food rituals, such as shifting the food around on the plate to look eaten, cutting food into tiny pieces, making sure the fork avoids contact with the lips, using teeth to scrap food off the fork or spoon, chewing food and spitting it out, dropping food into napkin on lap to later throw away
• Hiding food in strange places (closets, cabinets, suitcases or under the bed) to avoid eating (Anorexia) or to eat at a later time (Bulimia).
• Flushing uneaten food down the toilet, which can cause sewage problems
• Vague or secretive eating patterns.
• Keeping a "food diary" or lists that consists of food and/or behaviors (i.e., purging, restricting, calories consumed, exercise, etc.)
• Pre-occupied thoughts of food, weight and cooking
• Visiting websites that promote unhealthy ways to lost weight
• Reading books about weight loss and eating disorders
• Self-defeating statements after food consumption
• Hair loss and pale or "gray" appearance to the skin
• Dizziness and headaches
• Frequent sore throats and/or swollen glands
• Low self-esteem, feeling worthless and often putting themselves down and complaining of being "too stupid" or "too fat."
• Need for acceptance and approval from others
• Complaints of often feeling cold
• Low blood pressure
• Loss of menstrual cycle
• Constipation or incontinence
• Bruised or calluses knuckles
• Bloodshot or bleeding in the eyes
• Light bruising under the eyes and on the cheeks
• Perfectionism
• Loss of sexual desire or promiscuous relations
• Mood swings
• Depression
• Fatigue
• Insomnia and poor sleeping habits

Be aware, a sufferer does not need to appear underweight or even of average weight to suffer from any of these signs and symptoms. Many men and women with eating disorders do not appear to be underweight.

• Fear of not being able to control eating, and while eating, not being able to stop
• Isolation and fear of eating around and with others
• Chronic dieting on a variety of popular diet plans
• Holding the belief that life will be better if they can lose weight
• Hiding food in strange places (closets, cabinets, suitcases and under the bed) to eat at a later time
• Vague or secretive eating patterns
• Self-defeating statements after food consumption
• Blames failure in social and professional community on weight
• Holding the belief that food is their only friend
• Frequently out of breath after relatively light activities
• Excessive sweating and shortness of breath
• High blood pressure and/or cholesterol
• Leg and joint pain
• Weight gain
• Decreased mobility due to weight gain
• Loss of sexual desire or promiscuous relations
• Mood swings, depression and fatigue
• Insomnia and poor sleeping habits