Limericks

The Bishop of Birmingham:

        The dirty old Bishop of Birmingham
        Seduced two young girls while confirming 'em
        He caused them to falter
        In front of the altar
        And filled them with Episcopal spermingham

        But there was no stopping those two
        For they said as the Bishop withdrew
        Oh, the vicar is quicker 
        And slicker and thicker
        And longer and stronger than you

Another 'bishop' limerick is:

        There once was a Bishop of Buckingham
        Who stood on the bridge down at Uppingham
        Watching the stunts 
        Of the cunts in the punts
        And the tricks of the pricks that were fucking 'em

And another:

        From the depths of the crypt at St Giles
        Came a scream that could be heard for miles.
        Said the vicar, "Goodness Gracious,
        It's Father Ignatius,
        He's forgotten the Bishop has piles."

And, of course, the politically incorrect:

        Once an old queer from Kartoum
        Took a lesbian up to his room
        They argued all night
        Over who had the right
        To do what, and with which, and to whom

And:

        There was a young fellow from Boston
        Who drove around town in an Austin
        There was room for his ass
        And a half pint of gas
        But his balls hung out and he lost 'em